Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Forgiveness... a Gift to Myself


I have been thinking long and hard about writing a letter of forgiveness; today, on the eve of the last day of the year, I managed to do it! For 30 years I have held on to a painful experience of my past because I was ashamed and too intimidated to confront someone who caused me great pain at the very vulnerable age of 16. Why was I afraid? Because this man was someone of high importance and authority: a highly renowned specialist in the medical field of endocrinology. I was raised to believe that adults would always be believed over children and that if you had a complaint about an adult," Keep it to yourself." For years I have pushed the thoughts of confronting this man to the back of my mind. But now, for my own closure and peace of mind, I will send this letter, addressing the variety of ways he left a mark on my life. It may not lead to an apology on his part. It will likely be ignored. Knowing that my message was delivered will give me peace, because perhaps this man will realize the impact of his irresponsible actions on his patients. And, maybe, I will be able to forgive and let go of the pain. Tomorrow I mail the letter and forgiveness will set me free.
The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.” Mahatma Gandhi